I Slept With A Married Man And Am Ashamed. Here’s What I Learned From It
I met him at a common friend’s place when I was dealing with my first breakup. After a brief chat we exchanged numbers for work-related purposes, but he ended up proposing to me via a text message five days later. Since I was overwhelmed with sadness over my breakup at the time, I immediately agreed when he asked me out.
I did not bother checking his history or his marital status, because I was too preoccupied with other thoughts. Now I regret my hastiness ever so much. When we first met at the coffee shop near my office, he spoke at length about his interests and his hobbies, but not once did he mention that he is married with two kids. I was happy to have found a companion at a time when I badly needed one. He would come over every Saturday at my apartment and we would catch up. He seemed to have understood what I was going through so he tried to heal my wound and would often go out of the way to help me get over the negative feelings one gets post-breakup. Within no time, I found myself in love with him.
The first time I had sex with him, I forgot all the sadness I was going through. I was now convinced that this was the man I should have dated long ago.
Everything was going fine when one Friday afternoon, I decided to go see him at his place. I wanted to surprise him so I didn’t call him. When I got there, he wasn’t home, but his house helper asked me I could wait. I went inside and after a while, out of boredom, I began to go through his things in the living room. There I found a framed picture of his with a woman and a kid. I was astonished. “Who is she? Has he been fooling me all along?”, these thoughts swept across my mind as I called his helper and asked him about the photo. “Don’t you know her, madam? This is baaji and chotay sahab”, he said. “Baaji who”, I said to which he explained that the woman was my boyfriend’s wife and the kid was one of his two children.
I could not believe what I had just been told. Seeing the look on my face, the helper was afraid he had said something he wasn’t supposed to say. I returned home and after a meltdown, I began calling my friends who knew him. One of them, at whose house I met the cheater, told me that he has been married for five years.
Alas, I was in love with a man who had cheated on his wife and was lying to me all along. I spent the rest of the day crying in bed. The next morning he came to my house and began explaining. His defence was that he was about to tell me the truth but was ‘waiting for the right moment’. I did not buy anything he told me. I told him that he cheated on his wife and he should be ashamed. But his excuse was that it was an unhappy marriage. “Don’t I deserve happiness too? I found the solace I was looking for after I met you. I did not want to lose you so I kept it a secret, but I promise I will leave her for you.” I was deeply shocked by how things had gone down, but what I knew for sure was that I was not going back with him.
I broke up with him and told his wife everything. I did this because I thought she deserved to know his true colours. And I did not want another woman to go through the same. The lesson I learned from this bitter phase of my life is to never blindly trust a man you don’t know. After how he made me feel after our first meeting, I had decided to do as he says because I needed a companion. And this was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. My lesson is that NEVER trust a man, especially when you are in a vulnerable position.